Every breakup party I have attended since high school wouldn't have been the same without Heath.
Showing posts with label culture. Show all posts
Showing posts with label culture. Show all posts
Friday, January 25, 2008
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Oklahoma- OK?
There is a funny episode of How I Met Your Mother that is all about re-thinking previously held opinions. One of the main characters, Ted, discovers that he has a fondness for an old shirt, food item, even an old girlfriend that he had disliked in past years.
This happens to me all the time. It's a great day when a hated shirt in the closet becomes the perfect complement to a new pair of pants, or when an old song pops up on my iTunes shuffle and I re-discover it all over again. Today I realized that my opinion has changed regarding the genre of the movie-musical.
Previous Opinion: I hate musicals.
With the exception of Sound of Music and My Fair Lady, I really could never stand them. The worst ones, usually set in the American West, featured calico-clad girls and men in suspenders breaking into song in the middle of a cotton field, among other awful pioneer cliches.
Updated Opinion: I love musicals, but I still do not like old musicals.
I thought through the musicals that have been made in the last ten years: Moulin Rouge, Phantom of the Opera, Chicago, Hairspray, even Enchanted, to an extent--I have enjoyed them all! It's fun to be surprised to learn that good actors are sometimes also good singers and good dancers (I'm not referring to "crossover artists" like J.Lo or Jessica Simpson- I think that those girls are lame and I'm not revising my opinion here).
I've gotten to the point where I look for movie-watching experiences that are fun and mindless- no thought-provoking, high drama for me. By Friday night, I'm ready for some mental cheesecake. The modern movie-musical is often just what I'm looking for.
This happens to me all the time. It's a great day when a hated shirt in the closet becomes the perfect complement to a new pair of pants, or when an old song pops up on my iTunes shuffle and I re-discover it all over again. Today I realized that my opinion has changed regarding the genre of the movie-musical.
Previous Opinion: I hate musicals.
With the exception of Sound of Music and My Fair Lady, I really could never stand them. The worst ones, usually set in the American West, featured calico-clad girls and men in suspenders breaking into song in the middle of a cotton field, among other awful pioneer cliches.
Updated Opinion: I love musicals, but I still do not like old musicals.
I thought through the musicals that have been made in the last ten years: Moulin Rouge, Phantom of the Opera, Chicago, Hairspray, even Enchanted, to an extent--I have enjoyed them all! It's fun to be surprised to learn that good actors are sometimes also good singers and good dancers (I'm not referring to "crossover artists" like J.Lo or Jessica Simpson- I think that those girls are lame and I'm not revising my opinion here).
I've gotten to the point where I look for movie-watching experiences that are fun and mindless- no thought-provoking, high drama for me. By Friday night, I'm ready for some mental cheesecake. The modern movie-musical is often just what I'm looking for.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Iowa Schmiowa
Although for all of our sake, I usually refrain from political commentary on this light-hearted and rarely controversial blog site, I decided to make an exception today due to the fact that we are in an election year and today was the very important first step in the process of electing a new American President. I am going to give you...wait for it...the official Cum Grano Salis position on all things political.
1. All political candidates are liars and flatterers. The few candidates who may actually posess principles will more than likely be corrupted by the intoxication of power within a month of taking office, and if, by some fluke, they actually try to accomplish anything they had promised to do, they will be thwarted by Congress and the bureaucratic red tape of the American political system.
2. Any Republican loser who wins the nomination would be less horrible than Hillary Clinton.
3. Of the Republican losers, Mike Huckabee is my least favorite because he taking advantage of evangelicals. I am equally unimpressed with evangelicals who are going along with it.
Now you can forego all political commentary between now and November and vote for the guy with the nicest tie on Election Day.
1. All political candidates are liars and flatterers. The few candidates who may actually posess principles will more than likely be corrupted by the intoxication of power within a month of taking office, and if, by some fluke, they actually try to accomplish anything they had promised to do, they will be thwarted by Congress and the bureaucratic red tape of the American political system.
2. Any Republican loser who wins the nomination would be less horrible than Hillary Clinton.
3. Of the Republican losers, Mike Huckabee is my least favorite because he taking advantage of evangelicals. I am equally unimpressed with evangelicals who are going along with it.
Now you can forego all political commentary between now and November and vote for the guy with the nicest tie on Election Day.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Reflections On Lost
Stephen and I are on the hunt for a good new TV show to get into. We can beat the Friends characters to every punch line on every episode of every season, and we're caught up on 24 until all of Season 6 is released. We don't want to watch anything that's currently showing, because we want to be able to watch as many episodes as we want, at any given time, without any commercial interruption.
On Friday night, after being grossly underwhelmed by the selection of New Releases at Hastings, we decided to rent the first disc of Lost, Season 1.
Stephen loved it. I was so scared by the pilot episode that I ended up curled up on the couch, watching the last three-quarters of it through tiny slits between my fingers. The whole show premise is bad enough: 48 people are stranded on a remote island after a horrific plane crash. Within a few minutes, it becomes clear that some of the people on the plane are scary all in themselves, there are unidentified, giant wild animals inhabiting the island, and it is suggested that maybe other people have been stranded and died there before.
In the scariest scene of the pilot, a girl named Kate finds herself running through the jungle, chased by some unseen monster that has just chewed up another character and strung his bloody remains in the treetops. I tried to explain to Stephen how much I felt her panic. "I would rather drop dead than be that afraid."
Stephen said I was a coward.
I did agree to finish off the disc, and to suspend my judgment of the show until I had seen more of it. It did mellow out a little bit, and the mysteries surrounding the characters themselves have me curious enough to continue on to disc 2.
The thing that I do like about horrific shows like Lost and 24 is that they give me a comforting perspective on my own problems:
On Friday night, after being grossly underwhelmed by the selection of New Releases at Hastings, we decided to rent the first disc of Lost, Season 1.
Stephen loved it. I was so scared by the pilot episode that I ended up curled up on the couch, watching the last three-quarters of it through tiny slits between my fingers. The whole show premise is bad enough: 48 people are stranded on a remote island after a horrific plane crash. Within a few minutes, it becomes clear that some of the people on the plane are scary all in themselves, there are unidentified, giant wild animals inhabiting the island, and it is suggested that maybe other people have been stranded and died there before.
In the scariest scene of the pilot, a girl named Kate finds herself running through the jungle, chased by some unseen monster that has just chewed up another character and strung his bloody remains in the treetops. I tried to explain to Stephen how much I felt her panic. "I would rather drop dead than be that afraid."
Stephen said I was a coward.
I did agree to finish off the disc, and to suspend my judgment of the show until I had seen more of it. It did mellow out a little bit, and the mysteries surrounding the characters themselves have me curious enough to continue on to disc 2.
The thing that I do like about horrific shows like Lost and 24 is that they give me a comforting perspective on my own problems:
- Maybe I'm hungry, but at least I don't have to pilfer through dead people's pockets looking for something to eat.
- Maybe this hotel room is kind of dingy, but at least weaponized nerve gas is not coming into my room through the air conditioning.
- Maybe my shoes hurt my feet, but at least I am not having to sew up my own gaping wound with a thread from someone's travel sewing kit and a needle sterilized by a travel-sized bottle of vodka.
- Maybe my needy students were especially emotionally taxing today, but at least I didn't have to shoot my boss in the head to avoid giving away my undercover position as a member of a terrorist network.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Back in the Game
I have always been a big Caedmon's fan, and I've always taken it for granted that everything they put out in stores would be great.A recent Google search of music review and CC fan pages made me aware that I seem to be one of few fans who still feels this way, after the past several albums which apparently have been poorly received.
However, Overdressed brings back Derek Webb, as everyone who has been within 10 feet of this CD already knows. It's a great project that has brought fans both loyal and disenfranchised back together in love and adoration of what I consider to be the greatest band still recording Christian music.
Buy it.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Watch Cable, Learn Stuff
There is a strong belief that comes to light especially in the idle days of summer, and that is the idea that television numbs the mind and wastes precious hours. I would like to offer another perspective.
As you know, I have had access to cable for the past two weeks in our temporary digs, and I have taken full advantage of this opportunity to increase my knowledge on many subjects. Here is what I would not have known if it weren't for the tube:
A pencil skirt is a must-have in any working woman's wardrobe.
You can't get an epidural if you arrive at the hospital already dilated past a certain point.
It is a big deal that Victoria Beckham is moving to L.A.
Natural births are overrated. Drugs are good.
There are at least three new Sonic commercials out.
Christian Slater is one of the forty sexiest people in the entire world.
Most people who pluck their own eyebrows are doing it wrong.
Kate Hudson's brother Wyatt plays hockey for a team in Vancouver.
The proper way of using an eyelash curler is to squeeze it close to your eyelid, pump once, pull out a little, pump again, and pump a third time on the very tip of the lashes.
Joe Kennedy was exceedingly ambitious.
The Oreo was not the first chocolate and cream sandwich cookie introduced in the U.S.
One expert believes that J.K. Rowling is going to kill off Fred and George Weasley in the final book. Another predicts that Harry will die.
Fascinating facts like that, my friends, are what you won't read in your local paper.
As you know, I have had access to cable for the past two weeks in our temporary digs, and I have taken full advantage of this opportunity to increase my knowledge on many subjects. Here is what I would not have known if it weren't for the tube:
A pencil skirt is a must-have in any working woman's wardrobe.
You can't get an epidural if you arrive at the hospital already dilated past a certain point.
It is a big deal that Victoria Beckham is moving to L.A.
Natural births are overrated. Drugs are good.
There are at least three new Sonic commercials out.
Christian Slater is one of the forty sexiest people in the entire world.
Most people who pluck their own eyebrows are doing it wrong.
Kate Hudson's brother Wyatt plays hockey for a team in Vancouver.
The proper way of using an eyelash curler is to squeeze it close to your eyelid, pump once, pull out a little, pump again, and pump a third time on the very tip of the lashes.
Joe Kennedy was exceedingly ambitious.
The Oreo was not the first chocolate and cream sandwich cookie introduced in the U.S.
One expert believes that J.K. Rowling is going to kill off Fred and George Weasley in the final book. Another predicts that Harry will die.
Fascinating facts like that, my friends, are what you won't read in your local paper.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Lydia Asked for It
Here...watch this until I get something new put up. I'm planning to be inspired tomorrow.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Webby Thoughts
We've had the opportunity for some cooler-than-usual activities lately, ranging from a Shakespeare play in a beautiful intimate venue to a rocking outdoor concert courtesy of Baylor BYX. Sandwiched in the middle of this was a last-minute concert that we attended in Common Grounds, which is a tiny little house-turned coffee shop adjoining campus.
Anyway, the featured artist is Derek Webb, who I have loved ever since his Caedmon's Call days. Now that he works alone, his music controversial enough to make me feel very hip and edgy when I listen to it. His lyrics are very thoughtful, though, and I appreciate the challenge of his ideas even when I don't completely agree with his conclusions.
Knowing that Common Grounds would be packed if only thirty people showed up, Stephen and I decided to bring some books and the computer and we camped out about four hours before the show (we actually only meant to be three hours early, but I had been mistaken about the actual starting time). It was pretty exciting, because from my seat I could see when Derek Webb got there and listen to the sound checks. I admit, only a little bit sheepishly, that I am fascinated by celebrities, and it thrilled me that DW had to walk right past me to get to the bathroom and also that I walked close enough to his guitars to read his phone number on the luggage tag. (I didn't write it down or remember it, I promise.)
Anyway, once the whole thing started, we were within spitting distance from the mic. There were lots of people crowded in around us, and after a couple of songs I was reminded of my least favorite kind of concert patron: the wannabe band member. This person knows every song word for word, and sings along with the artist at full volume. I think that the underlying desire of this fan is for the artist to hear his or her beautiful music and invite said fan to come sing on stage, and maybe even to come along for the rest of the tour. Unfortunately, this was not this fan's lucky day, despite his best efforts.
The whole thing got started late and ran even later, but the experience was worth the groggy eyes and general crankiness the next day. Concerts are fun!
Anyway, the featured artist is Derek Webb, who I have loved ever since his Caedmon's Call days. Now that he works alone, his music controversial enough to make me feel very hip and edgy when I listen to it. His lyrics are very thoughtful, though, and I appreciate the challenge of his ideas even when I don't completely agree with his conclusions.
Knowing that Common Grounds would be packed if only thirty people showed up, Stephen and I decided to bring some books and the computer and we camped out about four hours before the show (we actually only meant to be three hours early, but I had been mistaken about the actual starting time). It was pretty exciting, because from my seat I could see when Derek Webb got there and listen to the sound checks. I admit, only a little bit sheepishly, that I am fascinated by celebrities, and it thrilled me that DW had to walk right past me to get to the bathroom and also that I walked close enough to his guitars to read his phone number on the luggage tag. (I didn't write it down or remember it, I promise.)
Anyway, once the whole thing started, we were within spitting distance from the mic. There were lots of people crowded in around us, and after a couple of songs I was reminded of my least favorite kind of concert patron: the wannabe band member. This person knows every song word for word, and sings along with the artist at full volume. I think that the underlying desire of this fan is for the artist to hear his or her beautiful music and invite said fan to come sing on stage, and maybe even to come along for the rest of the tour. Unfortunately, this was not this fan's lucky day, despite his best efforts.
The whole thing got started late and ran even later, but the experience was worth the groggy eyes and general crankiness the next day. Concerts are fun!
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
The 100th Post: the Josh Report
The first time I went to see Josh Groban, I was overwhelmed not only by his swoony voice, which is just as magnificent in person as it is on the CD, but also by his rather awkward and...okay, dorky...sense of humor. He seemed very much like a regular guy who had not yet mastered the art of stage presence. He talked too fast, used a circus-announcer voice to introduce his band members, and his expressions and jokes, which might have been funny among close friends at summer camp, fell very flat.
Last night I attended my second Josh concert at the American Airlines Center in Dallas. He sang a lot of new songs from his AWAKE CD, which I happen to really love, so I was happy. And here was the shocking news: he was funny! There was still a hint of dorkiness about him, but I almost didn't notice it because I was so busy laughing with him, not at him.
I was actually a little disappointed. I had been looking forward to talented-yet-awkward Josh. This was just a smooth guy with a great voice. What a letdown...until...
...there was a long instrumental song where Josh disappeared for a few minutes, and then he showed back up onstage wearing a long sleeved t-shirt and a black vest. Not the cool puffy kind, or a sporty fleece kind, but a regular old, suede-y black vest with a cinching clasp in the back. It was completely uncool!
It took me a while to pinpoint why this was so important to me. Here's my hypothesis: It is much more fun to be a fan of a person who seems to be genuinely likeable, the kind of person who would be fun to chat with at Starbucks. If Josh Groban had the voice of an angel and was also a debonair conversationalist, he would be absolutely unapproachable. If he was all of these things and arrogant on top of it, no one would want to approach him anyway.
I probably say this because I'm a little bit of a dork myself, but Josh Groban's awkwardness is part of his appeal. It makes him seem like a normal person. If we were ever hanging out and singing, he he would be much more awesome than me. But then, I could answer, "Well, maybe I can't sing, but at least I'm not wearing a suede vest," and then we'd be even.
So, anyway. The concert report is that we had an incredible time, and it was entirely worth getting in late on a work night. And if Josh Groban ever did invite me to be his friend, it would still be cool with me.
Last night I attended my second Josh concert at the American Airlines Center in Dallas. He sang a lot of new songs from his AWAKE CD, which I happen to really love, so I was happy. And here was the shocking news: he was funny! There was still a hint of dorkiness about him, but I almost didn't notice it because I was so busy laughing with him, not at him.
I was actually a little disappointed. I had been looking forward to talented-yet-awkward Josh. This was just a smooth guy with a great voice. What a letdown...until...
...there was a long instrumental song where Josh disappeared for a few minutes, and then he showed back up onstage wearing a long sleeved t-shirt and a black vest. Not the cool puffy kind, or a sporty fleece kind, but a regular old, suede-y black vest with a cinching clasp in the back. It was completely uncool!
It took me a while to pinpoint why this was so important to me. Here's my hypothesis: It is much more fun to be a fan of a person who seems to be genuinely likeable, the kind of person who would be fun to chat with at Starbucks. If Josh Groban had the voice of an angel and was also a debonair conversationalist, he would be absolutely unapproachable. If he was all of these things and arrogant on top of it, no one would want to approach him anyway.
I probably say this because I'm a little bit of a dork myself, but Josh Groban's awkwardness is part of his appeal. It makes him seem like a normal person. If we were ever hanging out and singing, he he would be much more awesome than me. But then, I could answer, "Well, maybe I can't sing, but at least I'm not wearing a suede vest," and then we'd be even.
So, anyway. The concert report is that we had an incredible time, and it was entirely worth getting in late on a work night. And if Josh Groban ever did invite me to be his friend, it would still be cool with me.
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Hips Don't Lie
We went and saw Music and Lyrics today. I'm not predicting any Oscar nominations for it, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's predictable and at times, corny, but it's a good flick. And, my favorite part: more footage of Hugh Grant dancing!
Stephen does not understand my fascination. He has tried all sorts of tactics to make me feel guilty for enjoying movies for this reason, but to no avail. I don't completely understand it myself, but the little hip-shakes make me laugh.
And since I am all about sharing the love on this blog, I am providing a clip for you to enjoy first-hand.
Stephen does not understand my fascination. He has tried all sorts of tactics to make me feel guilty for enjoying movies for this reason, but to no avail. I don't completely understand it myself, but the little hip-shakes make me laugh.
And since I am all about sharing the love on this blog, I am providing a clip for you to enjoy first-hand.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Turn It Up
Just about everyone believes in the power of music, so I won't really go into much of an argument here, except to share my own experience from back in the days when I had all the free music that I wanted at my fingertips, courtesy of the Original Napster. I loved making playlists for all occasions, from "Girl Power!!" to "8AM Classes" to "Clay is my American Idol." I endured a breakup during my freshman year of college thanks to the great song by Sister Hazel called "Thank You" (chorus: You were the one/who taught me what I don't need/and I thank you for that/Now just leave me alone).
I hadn't tapped into to the power of music lately, until I bought the January issue of Real Simple for my plane trip to Florida. One of the articles made the case that everyone should have a "theme song" that they can sing at times when they need reassurance, such as on the way to a job interview or in preparing for a difficult conversation. The idea is that you choose a song that makes you feel energized and confident, and helps you to put your best foot forward, like listening to Jock Jams in the locker room. The author had chosen "I Will Survive," and she also suggested such songs as "Footloose," "Let's Get it Started," and "Life is a Highway." It can either be just a peppy song, or a song that reminds you of a particularly powerful moment in your life.
So I've been trying to think of my own theme song. I think I can use one especially now, where I'm facing going back to work after a holiday, significant personal transition, plus the regular January blahs. Here are some of the contenders, along with audio tracks if they were available:
"I Have Confidence in Me" from the Sound of Music
"Tub Thumping" by Chumbawumba (high school classic, mainly for the chorus)
"Ode to Joy" from Sister Act II
"Jump (for my love)" by the Pointer Sisters
(if you've ever seen Hugh Grant shake his booty to this one, you know why this makes the list)
See? It's working! I'm energized already.
I hadn't tapped into to the power of music lately, until I bought the January issue of Real Simple for my plane trip to Florida. One of the articles made the case that everyone should have a "theme song" that they can sing at times when they need reassurance, such as on the way to a job interview or in preparing for a difficult conversation. The idea is that you choose a song that makes you feel energized and confident, and helps you to put your best foot forward, like listening to Jock Jams in the locker room. The author had chosen "I Will Survive," and she also suggested such songs as "Footloose," "Let's Get it Started," and "Life is a Highway." It can either be just a peppy song, or a song that reminds you of a particularly powerful moment in your life.
So I've been trying to think of my own theme song. I think I can use one especially now, where I'm facing going back to work after a holiday, significant personal transition, plus the regular January blahs. Here are some of the contenders, along with audio tracks if they were available:
"I Have Confidence in Me" from the Sound of Music
"Tub Thumping" by Chumbawumba (high school classic, mainly for the chorus)
"Ode to Joy" from Sister Act II
"Jump (for my love)" by the Pointer Sisters
(if you've ever seen Hugh Grant shake his booty to this one, you know why this makes the list)
See? It's working! I'm energized already.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Updates
1. We went to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra's Christmas concert this weekend, and it was incredible! Unfortunately, I think you had to be there to fully appreciate it. I tried to type up a long blog about it, and it just sounded like one of those awful amazon.com reviews that I always laugh at ("OMG, it was totally awesome! If you don't know this band, you should!"). So it's in the trash. I'll just say, the music itself was great, and the visual effects were really cool, including strobes, laser lights, fake snow, and other cool stuff that I don't know how to describe. The most interesting musician on the stage was a girl who could play her violin (very well) while running up and down the stage and dancing.
2. We got our Christmas cards in from Wal-Mart, and they are great.
3. Anyone who wants to be discouraged from teaching should come be my substitute for the next two days of school. There is nothing less productive than a fourth-grade classroom in the wee days before a big break. The fun thing is, fourth graders are young enough to want to shower their teachers with gifts. So I gratefully accept them, but I also think, "If you really want to give me a gift, why don't you stay home for this week?"
4. We're having our Christmas Nativity service for school tonight. My kids are in all the lead roles (you know...Mary, Joseph, shepherds...) and it is going to be special. Fun, fun.
5. I went to Cheddars for a girls' night out dinner with some of my co-workers. We had a great time chatting without having to worry about our conversation getting cut short by the tardy bell.
Okay...duty calls.
2. We got our Christmas cards in from Wal-Mart, and they are great.
3. Anyone who wants to be discouraged from teaching should come be my substitute for the next two days of school. There is nothing less productive than a fourth-grade classroom in the wee days before a big break. The fun thing is, fourth graders are young enough to want to shower their teachers with gifts. So I gratefully accept them, but I also think, "If you really want to give me a gift, why don't you stay home for this week?"
4. We're having our Christmas Nativity service for school tonight. My kids are in all the lead roles (you know...Mary, Joseph, shepherds...) and it is going to be special. Fun, fun.
5. I went to Cheddars for a girls' night out dinner with some of my co-workers. We had a great time chatting without having to worry about our conversation getting cut short by the tardy bell.
Okay...duty calls.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
The Fabulous Life
Since we don't really get any TV channels to speak of, my favorite way to decompress when I get home from work is to read magazines. Magazines are like potato chips for the brain. I subscribe to the wholesome mags Better Homes and Gardens, Reader's Digest, and Good Housekeeping. However, one of my all time favorite magazines is People, and I have been able to read it like crazy since I got a big stack of hand-me-downs from my sister-in-law Sandy.
I've had lots of reminders as I've read through this stack of outdated celebrity gossip that the celebrity world and my own world are not even on the same plane of reality. I've come up with unanswerable questions such as:
1. Why are Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan making headlines in every issue? They haven't done anything worth being famous for in a long time! Has Britney had a single since she got married to K-Fed? Has Lindsay made a movie since Mean Girls?
2. What must it be like to carry a handbag (or any fashion accessory) worth over $1000? I'd really like to see a glamour pic of someone in their Armani formal, sporting a purse that they bought on sale at Shoe Carnival.
3. How is it that all of the major celebrities are friends with each other? It's a lot of people who are spread out all over the world (when you include people with homes in other countries). We laugh when someone makes an assumption like "You went to A&M? Did you ever know my cousin?" But in Celebrity-land it must be like "You're a celebrity? Me too! Want to come to my party?"
4. What do they do with all of that space? I read that Ashlee Simpson is selling her house (she is what, 20?). Apparently she lived alone in a house where the master closet was more square feet than my house.
5. What do they do to celebrate really big occasions? When taking your jet to Cannes is a typical long weekend getaway, how to you make an event?
6. Is there any fashion that a famous person can't pull off? I swear if I tramped around Waco in some of the outfits that I see on StarTracks, I would get laughed out of town. Is it all a matter of confidence?
7. Is there any hope for the children? Even if Suri Cruise wanted to live a quiet happy life in the Midwest, do you think it would be remotely possible? I wonder how old she would have to get before people could meet her without asking about Tom and Katie.
8. Where did I miss the signup for that life? I know that despite all the money, most celebrities live unhappy and empty lives. But if I could have my fulfilling life, my normal relationships, AND the jet trips to Cannes, I would be okay with that.
I've had lots of reminders as I've read through this stack of outdated celebrity gossip that the celebrity world and my own world are not even on the same plane of reality. I've come up with unanswerable questions such as:
1. Why are Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan making headlines in every issue? They haven't done anything worth being famous for in a long time! Has Britney had a single since she got married to K-Fed? Has Lindsay made a movie since Mean Girls?
2. What must it be like to carry a handbag (or any fashion accessory) worth over $1000? I'd really like to see a glamour pic of someone in their Armani formal, sporting a purse that they bought on sale at Shoe Carnival.
3. How is it that all of the major celebrities are friends with each other? It's a lot of people who are spread out all over the world (when you include people with homes in other countries). We laugh when someone makes an assumption like "You went to A&M? Did you ever know my cousin?" But in Celebrity-land it must be like "You're a celebrity? Me too! Want to come to my party?"
4. What do they do with all of that space? I read that Ashlee Simpson is selling her house (she is what, 20?). Apparently she lived alone in a house where the master closet was more square feet than my house.
5. What do they do to celebrate really big occasions? When taking your jet to Cannes is a typical long weekend getaway, how to you make an event?
6. Is there any fashion that a famous person can't pull off? I swear if I tramped around Waco in some of the outfits that I see on StarTracks, I would get laughed out of town. Is it all a matter of confidence?
7. Is there any hope for the children? Even if Suri Cruise wanted to live a quiet happy life in the Midwest, do you think it would be remotely possible? I wonder how old she would have to get before people could meet her without asking about Tom and Katie.
8. Where did I miss the signup for that life? I know that despite all the money, most celebrities live unhappy and empty lives. But if I could have my fulfilling life, my normal relationships, AND the jet trips to Cannes, I would be okay with that.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Headlines
I have my IE homepage set to http://www.msn.com/. Since I don't read the paper or watch the news, reading the MSN headlines is my way of staying current with the happenings of the world outside of Greater W**o. I'd like to recap a few of the gems from the last couple of weeks that you might have missed. For your reading convenience, I've grouped them by category.
Animal Antics
Panda's Birth Caught on Tape
Fish With Female and Male Characteristics Raise Fears
Reptile vs. Man Movie Moments
Do Cows Have Accents?
Pint-Sized Panda's Giant Sneeze
And I Thought Sports Articles Were Boring...
Elephant Polo takes off in America
College Football Cereal
Kickball for Adults? It's hot!
Hot Celebrity News
Jessica Sings, but Voice Cracks
Bill Clinton Falls Asleep at a Mets Game
What the Rich Watch on TV
K-Fed Raps and It Isn't Half Bad
Unexplainable
Reviews of Movies & Random Stuff
India's Eatery Named after Hitler Getting a New Name
Chinese Police End Funeral Striptease Send-offs
What Newlyweds Can Learn from Celeb Breakups
Best Performance by a Hairpiece
The Rebirth of the Granny Flat
Advice for Life's Conundrums
Geeks: How to Date
Depressed? Marriage May Help
Dads: How to Charm Your Kids' Teachers
How to be Interesting at a Party
Sleazy Debt Collector Tips
Probing the Deep Questions of the Universe
Does Your Dog Need Daycare?
Are American Kids Stupid?
Does Bush Enjoy Potty Humor?
Should Fat Babies Go on Diets?
Is 60 the New 40?
How does Poison Gas Smell?
Extra!! Extra!! Breaking News
Pope Debuts a New Red Hat
Backstage at the Hooters Bikini Pageant
Bargains in Bangkok
Man Walks Away from Math's Top Award
Things That Make You Fat
Tortoise After .005 mph Six Week Journey
Animal Antics
Panda's Birth Caught on Tape
Fish With Female and Male Characteristics Raise Fears
Reptile vs. Man Movie Moments
Do Cows Have Accents?
Pint-Sized Panda's Giant Sneeze
And I Thought Sports Articles Were Boring...
Elephant Polo takes off in America
College Football Cereal
Kickball for Adults? It's hot!
Hot Celebrity News
Jessica Sings, but Voice Cracks
Bill Clinton Falls Asleep at a Mets Game
What the Rich Watch on TV
K-Fed Raps and It Isn't Half Bad
Unexplainable
Reviews of Movies & Random Stuff
India's Eatery Named after Hitler Getting a New Name
Chinese Police End Funeral Striptease Send-offs
What Newlyweds Can Learn from Celeb Breakups
Best Performance by a Hairpiece
The Rebirth of the Granny Flat
Advice for Life's Conundrums
Geeks: How to Date
Depressed? Marriage May Help
Dads: How to Charm Your Kids' Teachers
How to be Interesting at a Party
Sleazy Debt Collector Tips
Probing the Deep Questions of the Universe
Does Your Dog Need Daycare?
Are American Kids Stupid?
Does Bush Enjoy Potty Humor?
Should Fat Babies Go on Diets?
Is 60 the New 40?
How does Poison Gas Smell?
Extra!! Extra!! Breaking News
Pope Debuts a New Red Hat
Backstage at the Hooters Bikini Pageant
Bargains in Bangkok
Man Walks Away from Math's Top Award
Things That Make You Fat
Tortoise After .005 mph Six Week Journey
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Let's Go Rangers
A friend called yesterday with some extra tickets to "Faith Night" at Ameriquest Field in Arlington. This means that for the price of one ticket, we could attend an outdoor Mercy Me concert AND the Texas Rangers vs. Cleveland Indians baseball game. So we went. I'd like to share my observations and favorite moments of my evening of America's Favorite Pastime.
*Apparently there was a lot of discussion on Christian radio around the metroplex about whether or not it was tacky to use a MercyMe concert to get people to attend a sporting event. I brushed those concerns off with the pragmatic reasoning: "Hey, free concert for the price of a baseball ticket. Cool." But even I had to admit it was a little dissonent to hear park vendors shouting "Popcorn!" over Bart Millard's rendition of "Holy, Holy, Holy."
*Along the same lines, I also felt that it was a slight burring of the secular/sacred lines to see the Rangers mascot (a man dressed up like a horse dressed up like a baseball player) headbanging to some upbeat praise song, and later dancing with Bart Millard on stage.
*Concerts that are attended by Christians and youth are great places for scouting new and hilarious t-shirts, such as "This shirt is not pink, it's lightish red" and "You don't suck...you're made in God's image."
(Into the stadium, on to the game... )
*Okay. Baseball seems so simple when you're in third grade and running around plastic cone bases at P.E. But real baseball is way too complicated for me. For starters, everything hinges on very close-range details (was his foot on the base or not?), and it's impossible to tell at all what is happening from the stands. Secondly, I hate the scoreboard. Between all of the numbers and gridlines and one-letter abbreviations, I feel as if I am trying to solve a complicated word problem when all I want to know is if our team is winning or not.
*My favorite thing about baseball games, bar none, is the Jumbotron. It was so entertaining to watch the close-up pictures of the players and all of the funny Jumbotron games, I almost forgot that I was sitting through a boring baseball game. My favorite moments are 1) watching the "Kiss Me" footage and 2) watching the way that people react as soon as they see themselves on the screen. It's always a look of surprise followed by dancing or cheering with renewed enthusiasm.
*Speaking of the players themselves, it is just like I remember from high school: baseball players always have protruding round bottoms. Is it something about baseball that develops the gluteals into such a distinct shape? Or does having a ghetto booty somehow contribute to one's becoming an exemplary baseball player, like being tall does with basketball? Do adults approach young men who have that feature and say things like "Wow, that's a round butt you have there. Are you going to be a professional baseball player when you grow up?"
*Here is something I did not know: The popularity of The Wave did not go the way of The Mighty Ducks, as I had once believed. Oh no, it is alive and well with overzealous fans even in a rational place like Texas.
Of course, no baseball experience can even come close to watching my dear Aggies batter up at Olsen Field, but overall it was a pretty fun night. Thanks to the youth of Potosi Baptist Church who paid for a ticket and then backed out at the last minute so that we could enjoy the night for free!
*Apparently there was a lot of discussion on Christian radio around the metroplex about whether or not it was tacky to use a MercyMe concert to get people to attend a sporting event. I brushed those concerns off with the pragmatic reasoning: "Hey, free concert for the price of a baseball ticket. Cool." But even I had to admit it was a little dissonent to hear park vendors shouting "Popcorn!" over Bart Millard's rendition of "Holy, Holy, Holy."
*Along the same lines, I also felt that it was a slight burring of the secular/sacred lines to see the Rangers mascot (a man dressed up like a horse dressed up like a baseball player) headbanging to some upbeat praise song, and later dancing with Bart Millard on stage.*Concerts that are attended by Christians and youth are great places for scouting new and hilarious t-shirts, such as "This shirt is not pink, it's lightish red" and "You don't suck...you're made in God's image."
(Into the stadium, on to the game... )
*Okay. Baseball seems so simple when you're in third grade and running around plastic cone bases at P.E. But real baseball is way too complicated for me. For starters, everything hinges on very close-range details (was his foot on the base or not?), and it's impossible to tell at all what is happening from the stands. Secondly, I hate the scoreboard. Between all of the numbers and gridlines and one-letter abbreviations, I feel as if I am trying to solve a complicated word problem when all I want to know is if our team is winning or not.
*My favorite thing about baseball games, bar none, is the Jumbotron. It was so entertaining to watch the close-up pictures of the players and all of the funny Jumbotron games, I almost forgot that I was sitting through a boring baseball game. My favorite moments are 1) watching the "Kiss Me" footage and 2) watching the way that people react as soon as they see themselves on the screen. It's always a look of surprise followed by dancing or cheering with renewed enthusiasm.
*Speaking of the players themselves, it is just like I remember from high school: baseball players always have protruding round bottoms. Is it something about baseball that develops the gluteals into such a distinct shape? Or does having a ghetto booty somehow contribute to one's becoming an exemplary baseball player, like being tall does with basketball? Do adults approach young men who have that feature and say things like "Wow, that's a round butt you have there. Are you going to be a professional baseball player when you grow up?"
*Here is something I did not know: The popularity of The Wave did not go the way of The Mighty Ducks, as I had once believed. Oh no, it is alive and well with overzealous fans even in a rational place like Texas.
Of course, no baseball experience can even come close to watching my dear Aggies batter up at Olsen Field, but overall it was a pretty fun night. Thanks to the youth of Potosi Baptist Church who paid for a ticket and then backed out at the last minute so that we could enjoy the night for free!
Friday, July 28, 2006
Christian Coffee
I could come at this post from two directions. One, we just heard of a guy in Abilene who is opening up a Christian coffee house that is called "Monks." Their graphic-T design shows a monk giving a big bear hug to a nun, with the caption "Embrace the Habit." Har, har, har.
Or, I could talk about the Christian culture's kind of embarassing habit of creating Christianized knock-offs of successful endeavors in the greater society. The whole coffee-house thing is working pretty well for Starbucks and other smaller coffee outfits, so it's only a matter of time before we claim this business for the Lord.
Stephen and I were at the Java Hut the other day trying to come up with clever names for a Christian coffee house. We came up with some ideas, and now I'd like to get some of yours. Groaners are welcome (I will set the example). This is not a contest, because it is too stressful for me to choose winners. So add some ideas, and we'll all be winners!
*Holy Grounds
(Stephen says you could invite people to remove their shoes as they entered)
*WWJD: What Would Jesus Drink?
*JavaJesus
*BGCT: Best Ground Coffee in Town
*StarBYX
(Christian fraternity coffee...complete with knock-off logo)
*Focus on the Frappe
*The Joe of the Lord is My Strength
Okay. You guys are marketing experts, teachers, theologians...I have great expectations!
Or, I could talk about the Christian culture's kind of embarassing habit of creating Christianized knock-offs of successful endeavors in the greater society. The whole coffee-house thing is working pretty well for Starbucks and other smaller coffee outfits, so it's only a matter of time before we claim this business for the Lord.
Stephen and I were at the Java Hut the other day trying to come up with clever names for a Christian coffee house. We came up with some ideas, and now I'd like to get some of yours. Groaners are welcome (I will set the example). This is not a contest, because it is too stressful for me to choose winners. So add some ideas, and we'll all be winners!
*Holy Grounds
(Stephen says you could invite people to remove their shoes as they entered)
*WWJD: What Would Jesus Drink?
*JavaJesus
*BGCT: Best Ground Coffee in Town
*StarBYX
(Christian fraternity coffee...complete with knock-off logo)
*Focus on the Frappe
*The Joe of the Lord is My Strength
Okay. You guys are marketing experts, teachers, theologians...I have great expectations!
Monday, July 03, 2006
The Last Twenty Years
Stephen just got his WORLD magazine in the mail yesterday, and it had a great feature article where a very random selection of noteworthy people listed their favorite (not "The Greatest") books and movies for the last twenty years. The basic jist of the article was that although Christians bash popular culture a LOT of the time, we can also appreciate those "pop culture" products that are worth paying attention to. WORLD did not ask me for my list in time for publication, so I decided to display my own contributions here:
BOOKS:
A Return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit: a very readable discussion of the cultural consequences of devaluing modesty as a virtue.
The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver: a sobering but compelling story of missions gone wrong.
The First Man in Rome by Colleen McCullough: this whole series will teach you more about daily life in the last days of the Republic than any class could ever do. Plus, it's a story!
Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller: I love Miller's conversational style as he discusses following Jesus vs. traditional Christian culture. I don't agree with everything he says, but he raises some important questions.
MOVIES:
Father of the Bride: This movie could not be funnier, and Steve Martin looks just like my dad. I could watch this a million more times.
Pride and Prejudice: the miniseries: The only time I will say that watching the movie is as good as reading the book.
The Sound of Music 40th Anniversary Edition DVD: The anniversary DVD allows this movie to fall into my "20 years" category, plus it has lots of good interviews. I love this movie; it gave me a vision for my own future family life. If you ever see a bunch of children and their mom riding bikes around the streets of Waco singing in harmony, it's the Watsons! (No word yet on where all this musical talent will come from...)
The Buttercream Gang: They don't make them more wholesome than this. Was anyone else a childhood fan of Feature Films for Families?
This list is clearly incomplete: now it's your turn to add to it!
BOOKS:
A Return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit: a very readable discussion of the cultural consequences of devaluing modesty as a virtue.
The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver: a sobering but compelling story of missions gone wrong.
The First Man in Rome by Colleen McCullough: this whole series will teach you more about daily life in the last days of the Republic than any class could ever do. Plus, it's a story!
Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller: I love Miller's conversational style as he discusses following Jesus vs. traditional Christian culture. I don't agree with everything he says, but he raises some important questions.
MOVIES:
Father of the Bride: This movie could not be funnier, and Steve Martin looks just like my dad. I could watch this a million more times.
Pride and Prejudice: the miniseries: The only time I will say that watching the movie is as good as reading the book.
The Sound of Music 40th Anniversary Edition DVD: The anniversary DVD allows this movie to fall into my "20 years" category, plus it has lots of good interviews. I love this movie; it gave me a vision for my own future family life. If you ever see a bunch of children and their mom riding bikes around the streets of Waco singing in harmony, it's the Watsons! (No word yet on where all this musical talent will come from...)
The Buttercream Gang: They don't make them more wholesome than this. Was anyone else a childhood fan of Feature Films for Families?
This list is clearly incomplete: now it's your turn to add to it!
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